I am now a Dad!

I am now a Dad. Who would have thought a single gay guy like me can be a father one day? Yes, I dreamed of this long time ago but I never thought it would be possible. Matthew, my adoptive son, as I would call him in this blog, came into my life when I truly needed him. It was fours years ago when I seriously considered adopting. During that time, I just got promoted into a regional role which made me work most of the time from home. I was living alone in a condominium in Pasig. Interactions with people became less and less frequent. Day in, day out it was the same for me. I started feeling depressed. I got hooked with G app. I thought it could help me cope with the loneliness I was feeling. Almost everyday I was hooking up with different guys for fun. But that made things even worse. It made me feel not only depressed but also miserable. I never felt more alone in my life during those days. I started questioning the whole sense and purpose of my existence. If I die at that moment, so what? Why am I still living? How should I deal with the loneliness I was feeling? Do I need to be in a relationship? Be in another gay relationship which most likely will not last and leave you alone again and back where you started? I knew I needed something in my life. I knew I needed to find a purpose why I need to go on living. And I knew, I needed to be in a relationship. A relationship that can last. And that's when it occurred to me, of having my own child.